Thirty-One Things

1. I'm sitting on a bed, legs crossed, sipping on a glass of red
2. The summer is fading away. The leaves are changing color
3. The breeze coming in from the open window behind me gently caresses my skin
4. I officially did my first Fall hike this morning. I set out bright and early to brave the trail just before the sun started scorching
5. Its been a beautiful summer, full of lessons, love, laughter and heart stopping tears
6. I've gone through some significant, life changing experiences for the last six months
7. Oh Pandave, I'm happy to announce I'm the proud bearer of a few new scars
8. I find scars to be refreshing, they tell tales
9. Silently, discreetly, sometimes invisibly
10. Some scars are evident to the natural eye
11. Others only to the soul
12. I've traveled quite a bit this summer
13. I had the pleasure of visiting a dear friend, Rita. Our intentions were to sit at a streetside table and have lunch. But the sun and humidity forced us to sit inside in a cozy booth. 
14. Our lunch was full of candid conversations from the heart
15. A quick shopping spree, if you will, and a cup of coffee hours later
16. Yet our parting was a tear jerker
17. I've enjoyed a few good reads this past months
18. Nothing beats that curiosity that accompanies tearing through pages
19. Fall is my absolute favorite season
20. I have pairs of boots lined up in my closet and scarves begging to be wrapped around my neck. Yet my neck of the woods won't cool down fast enough
21. Regardless of where you go, what you do, whom you become, no one beats or even comes close to family or at least my family HAHA
22. A God-sent S.O. is a close second. Falafel with steak @130am. I think I chose a winner :)
23. I'm nothing without God. And everything with God
24. Regardless of a very scary, heart wrenching six months full of uncertainty with joy my heart can say that never once has God left me on my own or let me walk alone. HE has been so exceedingly abundantly faithful it blows me AWAY!!!
25. One day while lying on a procedure table, weeping like a baby, I found out the divine meaning of unfathomable peace
26. Even if my loved ones were waiting JUST outside the door, they couldn't be allowed into the procedure room, they couldn't be there to hold my hand or wipe my tears
27. Despite all their love and prayers, in that very moment I realized only God was/is omnipresent. And I was overcome by an overwhelming sense of peace
28. And my life hasn't been the same since
29. No matter how long we resist it, there comes a point when you just gotta let flaky friends go
30. Life is beautiful. Enjoy it. One day at a time.To the very fullest and with whatever you have. Don't wait for tomorrow
31. Nothing beats a well orchestrated GNO. I can't decide if it's the silliness of laughing at nothing and everything, or sitting quietly in reflection, sharing five rolls of spicy sushi, watching a comedy show together or even just the spontaneity of it all

Freedom

The breeze hits my face
a breath of fresh air
my lungs filling up
my feet pound against the pavement
I can't breath
Oh yes indeed I can breath
I push forward
momentarily blinded
not by dusk
from the sweat that dribbles my face
my heart thumps
violently against my chest 
my taste buds conjuring it
I know this feeling
This what it feels like to set myself free

What makes me feel the prettiest

• Sitting on the rug in my living, in front of the tv, my legs crossed, enjoying an extra hot cuppa tea
• Talking to my mom
• The feeling of clean cool bed sheets against my body
• My hair up in a bun
• A clear mind
• When he says "I miss you. Do you miss me?"
• Clean laundry
• A chilled glass of red
• A spotless bathroom
• A crisp cold bowl of cereal with a hint of vanilla&cinnamon
• Reading a new book
• How my hair feels after deep shampoo and conditioning
• A day off
• Hiking a trail that kicks my little behind
• When our song comes on a playlist or while we are out and we drop everything and dance to it
• The strength in my arms when I lift my 10lb dumb bells
• The first cup of tea in the morning
• Smell of lavender
• A fan blowing in my face
• How still my heart is when I pray or read the bible
• Resonating with music

Lover of my soul

My heart beats for you
it aches for you
my thoughts slow down without you
my eyes well up with tears for you
the beat picks up in anticipation
my arms long for yours
my stomach turns, the acid in it churns
my brain refuses to comprehend
the time as it lingers
I long for you
another second, day, week
sheets entangle my body, tosses and turns
My heart refuses to go on without you